Chapter 1: Prelude to Kool-Aid

by Christopher M. Ackney

Kool-Aid Man sat in his Fortress of Koolitude, lazily watching the hundreds of monitors before him. At any moment, there could be a call of distress, and that is when he would venture out and save the day. The Fortress of Koolitude was a grand place. Once a regular iceberg, before Kool-Aid Man infused the ice with every known colour and flavour, some no longer existing, others yet to exist, and the rest available at any grocer for only pennies a glass. Yes, life was good. It was no wonder that Kool-Aid Man smiled so often, it warmed his heart to see all the people of the world enjoy his life giving liquid.

Suddenly, a cry was heard. "Hey, Kool-Aid!"

Kool-Aid Man sprung from his chair, taking a stoic pose before the many screens before him. "Hmmmm," He thought to himself, "Little Timmy Greenhatten in Detroit needs Kool-Aid, and quick!" He bolted for the Scrambler ...

"You bet!" A voice called over the speakers. Kool-Aid Man stopped in his tracks. He turned quickly to look at the screen of Little Timmy. Little Timmy seemed confused, when the wall to his room shook, as if something smashed into it. "Oooooooooof" was noticeably heard. "*(*&(%$%$# wall." After a bit of stomping, the door to Little Timmy's room opened to reveal ... *gasp* No! It couldn't be!

He stood there with a sneer on his plastic pitcher face. One hand twirled a long thin mustache while the other held a plastic vile of a ghastly concoction. He sneered again and filled Little Timmy's glass. "Drink up, little boy, I promise that you'll like this." He chuckled evilly as Little Timmy raised the glass to his lips.

Kool-Aid Man shook in anger and fear, knowing full well that he could do nothing but watch. "Don't do it, Timmy." Kool-Aid Man pleaded. But Little Timmy could not hear his idol, and drank the vile liquid down. Little Timmy twitched violently, one eye began to vibrate while the other dilated to but a small dot. Little Timmy twitched again, then swung around in a fit, spouting out gibberish and speaking in tongues. Suddenly, Little Timmy stopped his spasms, and stood slack jawed before the beige pitcher that had entered the room. "Good boy." The pitcher smiled devilishly. "You are now my minion, and you shall spread my liquids to all your friends. Isn't that right, little boy?"

"Yes, master." The zombified Timmy murmured, his eyes blank and his mouth slack-jawed. The evil pitcher laughed maniacally, throwing his whole body back in a chuckle of pure evil abandon.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Kool-Aid Man screamed, hands gripping the sides of his spout. "Curse you ... I will avenge you, Little Timmy. Flavour-Aid Fella, you shall rue the day that you crossed my path, and prevented me my god and goddess-given right to spread joy and happiness to all who ask. Vengence will be mine ... as of now, Flavour-Aid Fella, I'm pissed!"

And with that, Kool-Aid Man stormed out of the monitoring room to prepare ...

TO BE CONTINUED ( right here!)....